Make your life happy – How to prosper and choose your life In pursuit of happiness

“I have no idea what happiness is,” someone confessed at a recent seminar of mine. She realized that her life was full of “to do” and not “wow”. She was buried under work and burnt out, unable to celebrate the joys of her life.

This audience member made me reflect on the true source of our happiness and prosperity. I am linking happiness and prosperity since the word “wealth” comes from “weal” which means “well-being”. Being happy and rich, that is, experiencing well-being, is not something that happens, it is something that we create, consciously with determination!

First of all, when I talk about happiness and prosperity, let’s make something very clear in Waterford. I am not referring to the superficial happiness of material pleasures, although these certainly contribute to our well-being and comfort. (Nothing like a cup of rich hot chocolate and a luxurious bubble bath, for example!)

What I AM talking about is the happiness that comes from living your life as YOU see fit, according to YOUR beliefs and principles, as well as with the guidance of YOUR Higher Power.

And being happy does not mean that your life is free from pain or sadness. In fact, I have found that pain and sadness can give rise to the most exquisite awareness of what it is to be fully human, to be in a body that sometimes hurts, holding a heart that sometimes breaks.

The first major heartbreak I experienced was when my parents divorced, alienating me from my brother and father. I was overweight and entered puberty with glasses, braces, corrective shoes and a large number of blackheads. I felt UGLY and unloved, so I spent a few years in silence, not speaking unless absolutely necessary. (I know it’s hard to believe this “big talker”, but it’s true!) I isolated myself from everyone around me and let my loneliness and sadness fester inside.

Then, at sixteen, I made a decision, a conscious decision, to be happy. I was in high school, about to get on the bus to go home, and I remember telling myself that everything I did from then on was for my happiness, growth, and empowerment.

My life radically changed, I lost weight, started singing and acting, became popular on my own terms, and began to see life as an adventurous script that I was co-writing with my Higher Power.

My story illustrates that happiness is a choice. It’s a choice I still make on a daily basis now. Here’s how to do it: In the morning when you wake up, instead of thinking about all the things you HAVE to do or SHOULD do, focus on all the things you HAVE to do. I choose to focus on what I HAVE to do, and let me assure you that a simple change in attitude makes a palpable difference in your happiness and well-being.

As the Dalai Lama states, “The purpose of our lives is to be happy.” And the process of discovering what makes you happy can take time and energy. But if you want your life to go from being a “thing to do” to becoming a “woo-hoo”, the first step is that little change in the morning before you even get out of bed. Your decision to make the day a good day is as essential as brushing your pearly whites or making sure your socks match before you walk out the door. Set your inner compass on what you HAVE to do and you’ll never have to say, “I have no idea what happiness is.”

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