Search the internet about menopause and you will find a wealth of advice, products, old wives’ tales, horror stories, brave and courageous articles on how someone climbed Everest or conquered the world in one way or another.

Baby boomers are an odd bunch in some (or perhaps many) ways. It is not for us (as many of the older generation did) to meekly accept everything that our doctors, mothers, fathers, etc. tell us. We want the Truth and we want it now! And if we don’t like The Truth, then we find a way to change it.
What is the truth ???

We look at aging celebrities and look closely at their photos to see how many wrinkles they have … saggy breasts … thinning hair … bags under their eyes … or do they look like they did in their early forties?

Easy for them, we say, they have access to plastic surgery, personal trainers, personal chefs, and lots of money to buy the latest anti-aging products.

What about us, the majority of the female population in the relevant age group? How are we supposed to deal with this dreaded word? Will our husbands still love us, or will they want to change us for younger, more toned and agile women? Will we be able to change jobs or will we have to put up with a job we don’t like in case no one wants to hire a parched and wrinkled middle-aged woman?

All of this sounds pessimistic, and for some women maybe it is. The purpose of this article is not to boost your morale and tell you how wonderful it will be to have sex now without the worry of getting pregnant. That even though we no longer have smooth skin, we have maturity and worldly knowledge and should be held in high esteem, etc., etc., etc. That menopause is the biggest thing that has happened to you since who knows what. As Scrooge said, “Bah, bullshit!”

The plain truth is that for most of us, menopause is a big change. Perhaps not all of us experience night sweats, soaking the sheets in the dark hours. Maybe not all of us have hot flashes or flushes and we want to rip off our clothes just to get some relief. Maybe our memories are still as sharp as ever. Perhaps our skin has not thinned to the point that we have to be very careful when scratching an itch. Maybe we haven’t gotten fat. And ladies, this list is not complete!
Before you go and jump off a tall building, wait, there’s more. More good stuff, I mean!

We will all go through menopause. There is nothing to stop us from aging year after year. But … there are many things we can do to prevent aging in body and mind.
Accepting that even someone like Cher won’t look like her when she was 20 is a good start! Sophia Loren continues to look amazing without adding the dreaded words ‘for her age’.

We don’t have to accept the idea that there is nothing we can do. We can enjoy the fact that now we can say what we think the most … we’ve lived long enough that we don’t care if we’re frank. I don’t mean that we can trample on another person without taking their feelings into account. We can say what we think and not be upset that someone might think we are eccentric or weird. Hooray for being weird, I say!

We can eat well, healthily, with occasional treats and not feel deprived. We can work out for our bones, our health, and to get that toned look that many young women just don’t have, relying on their youth to look good. For my part, I continue to improve my waterskiing skills (I learned to water ski in my early fifties when I married the second time and moved from padlock, cattle, and barrel to live with my American husband in the USA! South Africa and both ski between three and five times a week at Hartbeespoort Dam); I also exercise with weights three days a week and walk six mornings a week for half an hour at a time.

We can eliminate the emotional baggage that we have been carrying for a long time. Regular massage, reflexology, and other energy therapies like EFT can ease any physical discomfort and eliminate stress. Our children are now out of our hands, just as much as children are out of our hands! At least we don’t have to spend hours in the sun cheering them on at swim finery, going to PTA meetings, and making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch boxes. Catching up on reading we never did, on weekends with our husbands (it’s never too late for a moment of romance), especially taking time for ourselves. Finding a new hobby … practicing belly dancing … maybe doing some volunteer work with a cause we’ve always wanted to get involved in but haven’t had the time.

Here’s an idea for you to think about. Ever wonder why so many women get breast cancer? As women, we spend our lives pleasing and caring for our husbands, our children, our grandchildren, and our parents, especially as they age. All that love coming out of our bodies and minds. We want the best for everyone … but ask most women what they want out of life for themselves. The answer is usually a resounding … I have no idea.

So … the next time the florist asks if these flowers are for someone special, resist the urge to say no, they are just for me and say “YES! Gift wrapped please!”

When someone asks you about a weekend you are planning, resist the urge to say that my husband works so hard … he deserves it, and say “yes, we both deserve this getaway.”

Getting your menopausal life in order and having fun is not difficult. We just have to focus on the fact that there is life after menopause, and it is as good as we want it to be!