Writing lyrics can be a tricky thing. Sometimes it’s hard to know where to start. I’ve always found that if you think about the big picture of what your songs are trying to say, it makes it easier for you to try to get your message across. One way to do this is to answer a few questions before your pen hits the paper.

A while ago, I took a lyrical writing workshop with Pat Pattison, who is a professor of lyrical writing at Berklee College of Music. She had some of the students play her songs and then went over the lyrics with them. Many times, when she felt that the writing became confusing, she asked three rhetorical questions about the student’s work:

1. Who speaks?

2. Who is he (or she) talking to? Y

3. Why?

Since that workshop, I have asked myself these questions before writing any song. The reason is that these questions help you think about the big picture of your song, similar to what I talked about in the previous paragraphs.

If you still don’t understand why asking yourself these three questions could make or break your lyrics, let’s look at a real-world example, in the song (aka) “Forget You” by Cee Lo Green. I will argue that of the three questions posed above, two of them are clearly defined throughout the song. Is it so:

1. Who speaks? In this song, he is a boy who lost his girl.

3. Why (he is talking to her)? He is jealous, angry and still wants her back.

When we go through all the lyrics, you’ll see that those two answers ring true consistently throughout the entire song. But the answer to the second question is not:

2. Who are you talking to?

The answer to this question varies throughout the lyrics and keeps us from getting into the song as much as we can. You will notice that for most of the song, he is talking to the girl. his ex. But there are two lines in the song that are aimed directly at the girl’s new guy. They are these two lines:

I see you driving around town with the girl I love and I’m like,

forget you

Guess the change in my pocket wasn’t enough, I’m like,

forget you and forget her too

If he wanted to be super technical, we could even argue that in the line “I guess the change in my pocket wasn’t enough”, he’s either talking to himself or to the listener directly. But for lack of further confusion, we’ll tie that line together with the things he’s saying to the boyfriend.

You might say, “Okay, so what? It’s only two lines in the whole song. It’s barely noticeable.” Well, the problem is that these two lines appear in the chorus, so we constantly RETURN to them throughout the song. The perspective of who you are talking to changes, causing our minds to lose focus on what is happening and who you are talking to. On top of that, the song starts with these two lines, so we start listening to the song with the expectation that she’s talking to the girl’s new guy. But then for most of the song, it’s not.

We’ll see.

Chorus

(talking to the new boyfriend)

I see you driving around town with the girl I love and I’m like,

forget you

Guess the change in my pocket wasn’t enough, I’m like,

forget you and forget her too

(talking to ex-girlfriend)

I said if I was richer I’d still be with you

Ha, now ain’t that some sh-t?

And although my chest hurts, I still wish you the best with a…

Forget you!

pour 1

(Keep talking to the ex-girlfriend)

Yes, I’m sorry, I can’t afford a Ferrari,

But that doesn’t mean I can’t take you there.

I guess he’s an xbox and I’m more atari,

But the way you play your game is not fair.

I feel sorry for the fool who falls in love with you

I have some news for you.

Yeah go run and tell your little boyfriend

Chorus

(talk to the new boyfriend again)

I see you driving around town with the girl I love and I’m like,

forget you

Guess the change in my pocket wasn’t enough, I’m like,

forget you and forget her too

(talk to ex-girlfriend again)

I said if I was richer I’d still be with you

Ha, now ain’t that some sh-t?

And although my chest hurts, I still wish you the best with a…

Forget you!

pour 2

(Still on ex girlfriend)

Now I know, that I had to borrow,

Begging and stealing and lying and cheating.

Trying to keep you, trying to please you.

Because being in love with your butt doesn’t come cheap.

I feel sorry for the fool who falls in love with you

I have some news for you.

I really hate your ass right now

Chorus

(talk to the new boyfriend again)

I see you driving around town with the girl I love and I’m like,

forget you

Guess the change in my pocket wasn’t enough, I’m like,

forget you and forget her too

(talk to ex-girlfriend again)

I said if I was richer I’d still be with you

Ha, now ain’t that some sh-t?

And although my chest hurts, I still wish you the best with a…

Forget you!

Bridge

(Still on ex girlfriend)

Now baby, baby, baby, why you wanna hurt me so bad?

I tried to tell my mom, but she said this is for your dad.

Why? Why? Whoa, ma’am?

love you

I still love you

Chorus

(and once again to the new boyfriend)

I see you driving around town with the girl I love and I’m like,

forget you

Guess the change in my pocket wasn’t enough, I’m like,

forget you and forget her too

(talk to ex-girlfriend again)

I said if I was richer I’d still be with you

Ha, now ain’t that some sh-t?

And although my chest hurts, I still wish you the best with a…

Forget you!

Wow, those two little lines, they sure made a lot of waves throughout the whole letter, didn’t they? I had the question “Who are you talking to?” asked before pen hits paper, all this confusion could have been avoided.

You may be saying… “What are you talking about? This song is a hit! A Grammy-winning smash hit! There’s a reason for that, right?” Yes there are. The reason is that in successful songs the melody rules. This song has a great, singable and memorable melody. No doubt about it. But the lyrics lose strength due to the confusion of who is being spoken to in the lyrics.

If you’re an unknown artist, you’ll want to increase your chances in any way you can. So ask yourself three simple questions before you write your next song. Then decide if it makes the focus of your new songs sharper.